for the homeless it can be something different. it can be a painful reminder of the separation that exists between you and the family you left behind in another time and another place. it can be a clear reminder that you are isolated from the ones you love and put aside like a broken vase. while others celebrate, the homeless grieve what they've lost. fathers day in particular can be a painful reminder of this. the reasons for being homeless are indeed many and varied. the causes are layered in personal failure and regressions. however, the results are few and narrow and almost always have the common themes of loneliness, isolation and regret during a time like fathers day. noone knows what a man is truly thinking in his heart of hearts, but often if you look into a homeless man's eyes when he speaks of his family and particularly of his children you can see into that heart and know that what he is feeling is the pain of losing the children he loves.
the causes and reasons for being homeless are not pretty or something nice or something to be remembered except in dealing with the mistakes that caused a man to be homeless and not repeating those mistakes as you battle your way out the place that you now exist. while i understand the reasons for a family, a wife and ultimately the children turning their back on someone who is experiencing the many causes of being homeless, i will never understand abandoning them. whether justified or not, at this, the lowest and most difficult period of a man's life, is not the time to abandon them. i am not suggesting or condoning allowing them to be an active part of your family life...that is a personal choice only you can make and the reasons you have chosen to not allow that are individual and personal and only you can discern whether or not to allow them. i am suggesting that complete abandonment isn't the answer either. they need to know you care. they need to know you wonder about their personal safety and they need to know someone cares if they live or if they die...which very often isn't the case.
if you have someone in your life that has become homeless, for whatever reason, open that lifeline that is vital to each of us as human beings...the lifeline of hope and knowing that someone does care and someone does want to know if they're alive or dead. they are the same person that you once loved. they are the same person that was once a part of your life. they are the same person you once cared about. despite what may have happened to them and whatever caused their homelessness, underneath it all the same person still exists.
today on fathers day, tomorrow or any day, contact that someone you have pushed away. get in touch with that person you abandoned and gave up on. let them know, if nothing else you do want to know, as a human being, as the person they are, that they are alive and are surviving their ordeal. you do not have to open up the doors of forgiveness or acceptance wide to let someone know that despite it all you do care. it can..and does...make a difference in a persons soul to know that somewhere out there is someone who cares.
happy fathers day to all the dads. may god give some peace and comfort to the homeless fathers among us today.
see you around town